How long are you willing to say No to me?

The Lord has been speaking to me about the “O” word, obedience. If I desire to be in the center of God’s will, have peace and gain wisdom from God it will require obedience and faith!

 ¹⁸ “Come now, let us settle the matter,”
says the LORD.
“Though your sins are like scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red as crimson,
they shall be like wool.
¹⁹ If you are willing and obedient,
you will eat the good things of the land;
²⁰ but if you resist and rebel,
you will be devoured by the sword.”
For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.

This is a hard word but The Lord is full of love and grace so hear it from his heart, it is full of life! We don’t have to go through all of life soiled by the stains of our sin or rebellious heart! Christ came to set us free and restore us. Is there a cost? again, I know a hard question but hear God’s heart as you reflect.

The Lord has been asking me “how long are you willing to say no to me?” some of this response has come from fear, roots of Inadequacy, rebellion and lack of faith (which is really lack of trust)…. just being honest. I am not even talking about big request from God, just daily obedience which is not much for him to ask for. The reality of my “no” response to him has caused me sorrow………… I do not desire to displease the Lord, this has been bringing me great sorrow which is leading me to repentance! 2 Cor 7:8-11

The Lord has even taught me and spoken to me through a children’s book about Jonah. God spoke to Jonah, asked him to GO and Jonah said, NO.

Moses I understand had walked through roots of inadequacy and said NO to the Lord many times as well……

Isaiah 26:3 You will keep in perfect peace those whose mind is steadfast because they trust in you!

I desire to have a healthy fear of the Lord to move forward and put worldly fear in its proper place………….

Psalm 25:14 The Lord confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them.

He trust me and wants me to know incredible love and respond from there!!!!!

Pray this brings you hope and causes you to ponder with your heavenly Father!!!

Yes Lord!

Am I willing to Sacrifice for someone else’s gain?

Family and Friends! I am going to share a glimpse from my devotional time with the Lord, where he is speaking to me about some deep heart issues. This is an intimate place but he wants me to share it with you so I will do just that.

Mark 6:30-52 Starting in vs 35 the disiples begin to inform Jesus how late it is, the day has been very long for them…. send the people away so that they can go and feed themselves, basically is what they said! But he answered, “You give them something to eat.” The disciples then remind Jesus what this will cost them, they can not believe he is asking for so much from them. I hear them saying things like (You want me to give that much? That is asking too much, just give away what we have? what about our needs? You will take care of them but what about us? Jesus you ask too much of us!) Well if you read through to vs 44 you will see that Jesus miraculously fed the 5000 and also met the needs of the disciples. It must have broken Jesus heart to hear how the disciples did not believe or understand his love and care for them personally.

Well the day had been long so Jesus released the disciples who went into their boat and Jesus went to a quiet place to pray. (he is very aware of his need to refuel spiritually by spending time with God!) So just like life the next storm came and the disciples were in trouble and were terrified. Jesus came along the side of the boat, walking on water and again they are afraid because they did not recognize or believe that Jesus could walk on water. Vs 52 is what really struck me, They were completely amazed, for they had not understood about the loaves; their hearts were hardened.

They could have responed to the earlier miracle of provision with faith, an understanding of God’s heart for them and a whole hearted trust in Jesus to help them in their troubles and needs. But that is not what happened, they hardened their hearts. They allowed a root of unbelief turn to willful, hard-hearted rejection of Christ’s ability to help!  

So a week ago I began to ask the Lord the question, Am I willing to Sacrifice for someone else’s gain and he graciously brought me to this study within a week!!! I realize the question is a little off, I think some of the deeper questions might be, Do I believe I will have to suffer for someone else to gain? Do I fully trust God to meet me in my needs? Do I chose faith or do I chose to misunderstand God’s heart for me? Do I believe if God is asking me to do something for someone else’s gain that he will provide the means to respond to what he is asking of me and that my need’s are very important to him and he will provide how and when he determines is best?

The real question is more about do I know how much he loves me and can I rest in that knowing. Live Loved!                                             

Imagine the God who created the universe cares for YOURs and my needs! Fully trust Him today and know his peace!

I want to have a heart that responds YES to the Lord, along the journey I need to ask myself and the Lord some hard questions!!! I must say I am learning how gentle and gracious he is to respond!

A challenging question for us all as I sign off, where have you and I allowed our hearts to be hardened toward the Lord?

Live Loved!

“2011″ Change, Opportunities, Provision, Relationships and Babies!

“God’s voice thunders in marvelous ways; he does great things beyond our understanding” Job 37:5

Reflecting back on 2011 we marvel at the ways God has provided and led us along the way. Some days it feels like we are  learning to walk…… similar to what you might see when a toddler begins to take steps and stumbles, always looking for eye contact with mom or dad to help build their confidence and continue on with faith that the next step will be stronger! His lovingkindness has been a strength for me this past year, knowing that He loves me even when I am feeble!

2011 CHANGE seems to have been the theme!

• We began volunteering on Module B weekends with the Ellel team.
• 2011 Easter season Jenna-Rae and I shared our testimony’s around her darkest hour and God’s love for her!
• In May we met with the Ruby’s and began vulenteering to teach and minister at Jericho Road Ministries.
• We had a random person pay for our breakfast in a restaurant, very fun!
• July 3rd Randy shared his heart for our next steps with me over a coffee and we knew God was leading us to a new place.
• Randy was offered by his work to begin half time hours which enabled us time for ministry opportunities.
• Our season as foster parents came to an end, grieving was part of the process and God was in it!
• At the end of July Randy and I were blessed to take a drive to Maine for 4 days, we had some time together and time to reflect. I took a walk along the ocean and asked the Lord some questions around my fear to trust and His provision, it was a meaningful time but I did not sense any answers at the time. On our way home we were going through a toll booth where you have to pay $2 to get through and the guard said “go ahead the woman in the car ahead of you paid” I began to cry, I believed this was God speaking to me, yes in an unusual way but it was clear to my spirit!
• We were blessed to be part of a Jericho’s first baptismal experience.
• God taught me a very valuable lesson on honesty and I was truly loved by it!
• We were given a surpise cheque of significant value and a note saying “never forget, God is faithful”
• We began a basement renovation in order to rent out 2 rooms in our basement.
• Relationships with Randy’s daughters began to flourish and we are really enjoying getting to know everyone of them!
• Took a flight out to Thunder Bay to encourage missionary couple there that we love and see what God might have for them and Thunder Bay next! It was an encouraging time for all involved and we anticipate more opportunities like this!
• In September Randy began teaching at the Healing Retreats at Ellel and loves it. (we take in as many Ellel opportunities as we can!)
• We were given an opportunity to lead a Healing Retreat while the directors were away on training, great experience!
• We were accepted as ACCI missionaries, we have so much to learn and we’re enjoying the learning curve.
• Both our mothers and my father has had significant health concerns and God has been so faithful to care for them!
• My season of caring for a lovely woman at a nursing home has come to a close, God continues to teach me on a theme “Finish Well”
• Christmas was a learning curve in this new season and we embraced it!
• New Years Eve will be a fun night with Jordan, Jenna-Rae and their families around our table having a fondue, SO fun!

2012 News and things about to come!!

• Our daughter is expecting baby #2!
• Our son is having his 1st baby in the summer of 2012!

Thank you for staying tuned to our story we value your interest and time spent investing in us!!!    

If you would like to support us in any way or just check us out… go to ACCI’s website, you are welcome to journey with us:

www.adventive.ca

We love sharing our hearts with each of YOU!!                                                                                                                                                                                           Randy and Tracey

“Relationships” We need your heart!!!

I have to be honest with you… there are many trials and tests presently. My last post left off sharing God is teaching me some BIG things, well often it is through trials and testing. My heart is being stretched and the reality of my heart is often not found reflecting His character! The good news is HE loves me just the same!!!!! and will walk me through submitting these areas as I allow Him to chisel away the parts that hinder His glory! Sound a little painful? It is!

I am being challenged to trust him for my SECURITY, trust him as He shows me the reality of my heart, trust Him as He shows me how to love people (this is not easy and I am realizing the reality of my weakness and NOT liking it!) Trusting him for what is ahead becuase He holds the future not me!

So we had the privilege of making a trip to Kitchener and Toronto to visit Randy’s daughters, their hubbies and children, what a joy it was! We had a really nice time connecting face to face and playing with our grandchildren! Megan introduced us to Cold Stone….. great! Amber gave us some quick lessons on multi tasking….. 3 boys!!! We look forward to visiting again growing in our relationships!!! Family is VERY important to God and He is helping us and teaching us how to love each one uniquely, we have much to learn but we have  the best teacher!

Thunder Bay was challenging and yet so rewarding! Wow we really had a chance to see the darkness that is hovering and the brokenhearted reality of individuals! Our hearts have been affected by the devestation of the family unit and the long term affects of addiction they face. One very sad reality is that it seems most of this affects them very young, from birth to teen years, who can rescue them from this reality and what hope is there? God has placed people like Sky, Angie, Justin and Aylsha there to deliver HOPE! What a joy it was to do life with them although too short, talk, laugh and pray. We drove around the city hearing some of their story and the stories of young lives desperate for hope and life! I had many pointed moments with the Lord but one was going up the mountain and standing at a lookout above the city and praying in my heart that God would not only give the Hedricks hope and strength but that He would hear the cry of young lives that don’t know anything different than their reality! I could go on, so many things impacted us, perhaps I will get Randy to share what impacted him!

Our son Jordan is walking out life with all it’s struggles and tests and is growing to trust God one day at a time. Jenna-Rae, our daughter is a young mom and wife learning how to journey one step at a time, she has had many health struggles and is learning to trust God in all things, not easy, but worth every moment! WE are so proud of them as they take one step at a time and we love doing life with them!!!

Relationships seem to be the key focus He has us on, so with hope and trust we will continue to walk where He leads us.

Thank you for journeying with us, 

He led me to a place of safety; he rescued me because he delights in me. Psalm 18:19

What’s New and what’s happening with the Haws?

Hi Everyone!

I am so glad that you asked! Here’s the scoop this month and overview of the past month.

We had many opportunities to volunteer with Ellel Ministries during Healing Retreats, PMA appointments and teaching opportunities for Randy. (he loves where God is growing him!!!)

We are really enjoying our time at Jericho Road Ministries (an addiction treatment program).We are  teaching the men inner healing principles and facilitating  prayer ministry with some of them. I think these men are teaching us MORE than we are teaching them! It is a great opportunity for us, we love their hearts and honesty before the Lord!

Randy is pretty busy with his Quest Software job 2-3 days per week. Since his week is short now it seems very full most days but I think he enjoys the challenge. We continue to trust the Lord for direction on the balance of life and our schedule.

I am working 2-3 mornings a week with a lovely woman in a nursing home. She is in need of prayer, encouragement and practical care. The Lord gives me SO many opportunities there it is incredible. I am able to teach some to knit (just learning myself!!) crocheting, talk about life and sometimes they share their concerns, fears and worries. I fed a woman today, she is in a wheel chair and it seems most days she sleeps through lunch so today I spent 20 minutes with her and she ate her whole lunch. I asked her if she would look up at me (she has her head down low most of the time) she look right up at me, she has beautiful blue eyes and so I told her, she smiled and said thank you for feeding me, you are so kind and you really like my eyes? I said yes I do, she said thank you, smiled and went back to sleep! My heart LOVES these helpless folks….. wondering why God has SO given me a heart for them?

We celebrated with a friend from the Ellel team recently, she has had some incredible accomplishments and  miraculous healings in the past two years. I met her at my first encounter with Ellel so we have seen each other grow along the way. We are not together often but our time together is precious!

We are enjoying working with a team at Chapel Ridge that is seeking to learn more about the healing ministry and booking times of prayer ministry for people as the need arises. We have met with some from our church, other churches and even a few folks that came from Toronto! Our pastor has a city wide vision and we are embracing it!!

Our very GOOD friend Lauren was married and the wedding was such a God event!!!! Praise God for the work He is doing in hearts! My niece was also married in Ashton and it was so quaint and beautiful!! Love is in the air!!

October has been great too, we had our grandson Elijah for 6 days while mom and dad went away for some much-needed fun! Nona and Papa had a blast and Elijah survived his time with us!

Time together is Precious!!

We are heading to Toronto and Kitchener soon to visit and reconnect with Randy’s daughters. We are thrilled to have this opportunity and pray that God draws our hearts together in a way that will grow us all and honor Him!!

We are also working on a trip in Noveember to Thunder Bay. Our desire is to spend some time and encourage a missionary couple that we know and love. More to come on that trip!!

Oh ya and our 15th Anniversary is coming up!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow we made it and we are continuing to learn how to do life together!

sorry for the length and thanks for sticking with me to the end!

God is good, we love what He loves and He is challenging me on many things… I will share them next time! stay tuned

New Days, New Rhythm and New Hope!

 

Hi Friends!

Well as of September 1st Randy and I officially began our NEW season of walking by faith one step at a time! We are encouraged and challenged all at the same time. It has been full and we are aware that we will have to be sure to keep our eyes on God who is faithful, we want our hearts to want only what HE wants!

September 1st 2011 Randy was officially on a half time work schedule and he spent it up at Ellel serving on a PMA (personal ministry appointment… which he loves!!) Someone in our life told us over nine months ago that in nine months we would have a big shift and possibly be at the center…. well for the most part he was accurate and we are surprised at what God has done and is doing…. why am I surprised? I am not sure!

September 2nd I was blessed to attend a wedding shower for our lovely friend Lauren (someone we minister with!! and someone who has encouraged and taught both Randy and I more than she will ever know)

Then we worked our part time hours on September 5th and 6th. On the 7th we headed up to Ellel to join in a time of fasting and praying. We joined in near the end but it was a blessing none the less, Randy then taught on “Forgiveness” in front of the team which is part of the training process and he did such a “GREAT” job….. We were all very proud of him and it was a great time of affirmation!

The 8th and 9th were spent with Randy working on computer maintenance and I was teamed up with Karen for some PMA’s. Our week was very full and rich! We had a chance to go out on the boat so Cristy and Randy could swim across the lake, they did it in 28 minutes and Cristy swam her little heart out and loved every minute.

Next week we are ministering at the Healing Retreat and Randy will teach officially his first time during a healing retreat!! He is nervous but he knows God is spurring him on!

Thanks for walking with us!!

R & T

One step at a time continued…. Progress not Perfection!

Hi Friends!

Over the past few weeks God has been teaching me that as His kids trust Him and position themselves toward Him, He does not demand Perfection. His word says “Be holy for I am holy”. I understand this to say “be set apart or different because I am perfect”. He is PERFECT not me!! I choose to be different, set apart, and ready to listen to his teaching, correction and direction one step at a time. Depending on where you start from will determine how awkward the steps might be!

I really got this as my daughter and I were picking out shoes for our precious Elijah. For him, walking is “brand new”. As we stood him up with shoes on, he looked at them as if they were strange and awkward and I’m sure they were. He took a few awkward steps lifting his knee way up high then looked at us, then back at the shoes again and took another few steps. God is so patient as his kids begin to take steps, one at time always remembering to keep looking up to the Father for acceptance and the smile that is saying “well done, keep going”!

I pray that you keep walking one step at a time. It may be hard, awkward or brand new. Perhaps you have been walking so long you are tired. Look up to your Father and see what He has to say to you in your particular season of walking the rhythm of faith!

Thank you for walking with us!!!!!

In His hands!!

Randy and Tracey